1 month post-op thoughts

[missj93]

Hi guys, I just felt like making a quick post cus today marks 1 month from my surgery date and I wanted to share some thoughts/experiences/advice and also seek some support.

This will be a vague post (no clinic names or details) as I'm still recovering and deswelling and working on accepting my new face so I don't want to post info yet that may sway someone towards/against the clinic/procedure I did until I, myself, can form my own opinion on the success of the surgery. As you guys know, recovery is a long process.

Procedures I had done:

• Primary rhino
• Partial incision DES with ptosis on both eyes
• Sliding genioplasty on chin

My chin was advanced about 4-5mm. The side profile does look better and my smile isn't gummy any more, but now my chin looks bigger from the front and less feminine. I know there's still some swelling but I don't think it will ever deswell to how it was before (visually speaking from the front).

My nose, which had a hump and was bulbous before, is now quite a beautiful shape. Pretty enough that I was happy with the results for the first 2 weeks before I started thinking the bridge got raised too high. The radix starts too high, making my nose look really long and my eyes too close together.

My eyes turned out really even but with the ptosis correct, they are even rounder than before, making them look even more close together.

I know it may seem like I have a lot of complaints & I want to clarify that I'm not saying my surgeries were a failure. But for the amount of time, money, effort I spent on the surgeries, I really wanted it to be 100% success. I wanted to be someone who said "PS changed my life, I look so much prettier now, so glad I did this, my effort was worth it, etc etc". But instead, I'm left with lots of doubts and some regrets.

I was happy with my face before - I was never really beautiful but I was cute and my features were well-harmonized. I thought PS would fix my insecurities but still leave my face the same (if that makes any sense). Like, I would look the same, but the ugly parts would get fixed. But now I look different and I don't know if I like it yes, my features are prettier, but I don't think I got prettier. My face ratios/proportions changed and trying to evaluate as objectively as possible, I don't think they're as good anymore.

While I am slightly disappointed about the results of my surgery, I guess I'm still glad i did it. If i was still pre-op, I would always be thinking about it and wishing I could've done it. Now at least I can move forward - whether it's to wait for the final results, learn to accept my new face, or get revisions done.

I just wanted to make this post to make people realize that PS is not always sunshine and butterflies. I did my research, thought carefully what I wanted, and consulted with different clinics but sometimes the results are unpredictable. Maybe you don't get what you asked for cus your body has limitations. Or maybe you get exactly what you asked for, only to find out it doesn't suit you (we've all had haircuts like that, right?). What may look good on someone else may not look good on you, and I learned that the hard way.

I don't think I have body dysmorphia, and I think I've evaluated my results with an honest and objective mind. Again, I don't consider my surgeries a failure, but I originally thought PS would make my attractive level +10. Instead, it's more like, +10 but -5. It's hard to explain in a logical way, because aesthetics can't be easily put into words.

I'm also making this post to selfishly get some support. It's been a hard few weeks, flying to Seoul alone, recovering from surgery, etc. But the hardest part was when the visible swelling started to go down and I realized I still looked funny. If I'm not looking at myself in a mirror, these doubts run rampant and I start thinking I'm so ugly now. I have to constantly glance at myself in the mirror which gives me assurance, no, I'm hideous. But that relief is quickly followed by disappointment - I may not be hideous but I'm not really pretty either.

I'm anxious about seeing old friends so I've been avoiding social gatherings... and I can't really share my worries with anyone cus I feel like they'll just think I brought it upon myself. After all, no one forced me to get PS. So yeah.. recovery hasn't been fun. But anyways, I think that's enough rambling for today! Just wanted to share a little part of my worries and insecurities with the world. I feel a little better after writing it all down hope it helps someone in some way. I'll attach some pics below and when I feel up to it, I'll write a post with details about my consultation/surgery/doctor/etc. Thanks for reading!

 

[missj93]

Here's a few pics attached.. sorry for the weird filters. I'm trying to protect my privacy as best as possible

 

[jaspsev]

missj93 said: ↑

If I'm not looking at myself in a mirror, these doubts run rampant and I start thinking I'm so ugly now.

Click to expand...

Hell no, you still look great (filters and all). Just remember that as time goes by you will look better (once all the swelling and healing is done).

I share some of those feelings back when i had ht and well, you know if you have a lot of ht done it makes a person look like an odd looking half-plucked chicken. I would think "well, i didn't look so bad why did i do this" thoughts. Now after almost a year, I think it was worth the terrible half year I went through.

Well, I am just saying is be patient, give it time and it will work out. Good luck.

 

[nitekoala]

You look nice from the photo. At one month my eyes were still swollen ..even now at 3 months I think it's still slightly swollen lol. Recovery is really a long process, all the best!

 

[themrskwok]

U look pretty !! I kinda know what u mean. I would suggest you to have the attitude, rock it. I mean it can't be reversed now. it seems like if you were to do more revision your doubt will be deepened.

After all, you have done something you always wanted and that's life isn't it ? It is more important that we live without regret than live in the life "what if..."